Leaving

Current location: 37,998 feet over the North Atlantic - 329 days later.

At the start of this year, I thought leaving the US was the bravest thing I have ever done; I can now tell you that I am wrong. Leaving Denmark is, by far, the hardest thing I have ever done. Creating a life, being immersed into a new culture, turning strangers into family, and then having to say goodbye and leave them and all of this behind, to me that takes more strength then I can even comprehend. Not knowing when and if I will go back and realizing that after I leave, it will never be the same, this pains me. I am emotionally exhausted, I have said more goodbyes than I can count, I am nervous for what is to come. I continue to push towards positive thoughts: I am so lucky to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard, I get to hug my mom again, drive myself around, and eat chipotle. However, none of these optimistic thoughts help push past the reality that is set in front of me. I was not, and am still not ready to leave. This feeling is inexplicable – I am hoping that my rambling on can help you understand everything in my mind.

Besides all the goodbyes, my last two weeks were some of the most memorable. Student week flew by, with parties every night and an extreme amount of sleep deprivation. I also managed to make it to Aarhus and Aalborg one last time. I got to see Skagen, where the two seas meet, in the sunlight. My last day, was one of the best of exchange; my day started with horseback riding with Ditte and Isabella - I made it to a gallop without falling off. We laid in the sun for a while then my host family made the best last supper anyone could ask for: Danish Christmas food. We had fleskestej and risalamonde; hopefully I can repeat these dishes for my American family. Afterwards we made a kageman to celebrate my upcoming birthday, then ended up skinny dipping with strangers. Truly a night for the story books.

This past year I have lived more than I have in my almost nineteen years on this planet. I have laughed and cried more than ever before. I learned things I never would have imagined. I have learned to eat with both a fork and a knife simultaneously. Between waiting for busses, trains, and messages between time zones, I have learned patience. I have learned the value of a friendship and that family doesn’t always mean people with the same blood type as you. I have learned how to keep a clean internet profile. I learned how easy it is to forget, and to counteract this by taking too many pictures. I have found who I am, and who I want to become.

I will never forget Denmark or the many things it taught me. I will never forget crying over a missed bus and laughing uncontrollably with my new best friends. I will never forget the first time I felt at home in a place that was so new and unknown to me.

Danmark, jeg elkser dig og jeg haber jeg vil komme tilbage hurtig.

Vi ses snart.

AFS Goodbye

Denmark's West Coast

Airport Selfieeeee

I am really going to miss Denmark